Choosing Joy in Janky Times
Anyone who has spent more than a few minutes with me knows that one of my favorite words is “janky.” I use it so often that it’s been dubbed a Ouidaism—a word or phrase uniquely and often humorously used in my ultra-southern, illustrative way. Imagine my surprise when I discovered that janky is officially recognized by Merriam-Webster! According to MW, it means “of very poor quality.” Who knew? (Not me—until today.) But I digress.
I’m writing this from the emergency room, a mere six days into what’s supposed to be a “happy” new year. My youngest is miserable—hungry, tired, frustrated that she can’t play in the snow, and desperate to go home. If someone wished her a happy new year right now, she’d probably react the same way she did when the nurse tried to swab her throat. (Let’s just say the nurse was shocked, but thankfully, not offended.) In short, 2025 is shaping up to have a pretty janky start.
Oddly enough, this déjà vu moment reminds me of last year around this time. We were in a similar situation, kicking off what became months of health battles that my resilient child continues to overcome. (The details of her journey are hers to share.) 2024 didn’t just start janky—it stayed that way for quite a while. Sleepless nights, tearful conversations, and an endless rotation of doctor visits dominated the first seven months. Mining joy out of that year was no small feat, but it was—and remains—a deliberate choice.
As a mom, I’ve graduated from the umbilical cord to an invisible one that tugs at my heart whenever my kids are unwell. Their struggles weigh on me, and choosing joy during these janky times can feel like swimming upstream. But it’s a choice I have to make—for them and for me. My attitude can either add to the challenges or help us navigate through them with gratitude for what we have, even in difficult moments. Beyond having each other, when we allow ourselves to be open, we often stand in awe of the love and support we receive from those around us. We also carry countless reminders of the challenges we’ve already overcome and the peace and strength that followed. And then, of course, there’s humor. I don’t always know how we manage to laugh when we do, but I’m so grateful we can. So, here’s to practicing joy—even when the start of the year feels anything but joyful.
Steps to Find Joy in Janky Times:
Face the tough stuff: It’s okay to admit when things are hard. Let yourself feel it—it’s part of the process.
Find the good: Even when life feels upside down, there’s usually something to be grateful for—big or small. Focus on that.
Let people help: Don’t be afraid to lean on your people. Their love and support can make all the difference.
Look back to move forward: Remember the hard times you’ve gotten through before. You’re stronger than you think!
Laugh when you can: Humor has a way of sneaking in when you need it most. Embrace those moments—they’re gold. Then laugh out loud!
Choose joy on purpose: Joy doesn’t just show up—it’s something you decide to look for, even on the rough days.
